Another New Year's Eve in the ICU

Over the past 8 years, I've spent 5 New Year's Eve's in the Intensive Care Unit with my mother.  She suffers from COPD and a vocal chord dysfunction that messes with her breathing when she gets run down or overly anxious.  The Holiday's seem to bring on her anxiety and a bit of sadness from missing my dad who passed almost 18 years ago now.  It seems to be a time of year that brings those same feelings out in a lot of people, as the ICU is always full.  In speaking with the nurses over the years, they all say it is their busiest time - they see a lot of heart attacks, anxiety, depression and sickness due to being over tired.  

This past New Year's Eve was no different for me and as I sat in the ICU, I could not help but wonder why we have taken a time of year that is supposed to be full of peace and joy and turned it into a time of stress and anxiety?  We obsess over finding the perfect gifts for people while racking up mounds of debt when in reality, we've been given a great gift each day...the gift of life.  There were many families there that night that were gathered to bid farewell to their loved one and there were other families who were celebrating their loved one being saved.  The hospital is that place where life and death come to mingle so closely with one another, a place where you see a gamut of emotions collide - from great joy to great sadness.  And as I sat there, I could not help but think I was about to be given the gift of a new year...365 days, 8,760 hours.  How would I use it?  How would I approach each day that is given to me?  Sitting there with my mom knowing she was going to be okay, I felt an overwhelming sense of peace come over me.  I made the decision to not worry about trying to make each day perfect, but rather to just be present in it and grateful for it.  

This year has certainly been full of challenges, but by being 'present' in each day, it has been easier to overcome them...taking it as it comes without dwelling on the past or worrying too much about the future.  Being able to better process all that anxiety, drama and stress that is thrown at us daily opens the mind to see the goodness and beauty that surrounds us, even in the most difficult of days.  

One of the most incredible soul singers who died far too early at the age of 59, Teddy Pendergrass, said it best:  "This gift of life, it's the only thing you can't buy for money."  A free gift every day...what more could you ask for?